The year was 2006. I was living in a frustrating town. I was dating an infuriating man. I was working for questionable people. Most importantly: I was living with my head shoved firmly up my own butt.

At least, I must have been if I just learned about this movie last night:

Where the hell was I when this came out?! What the fuck was I doing? How the bloody christ did I miss this?!

Behind the Mask: The rise of Leslie Vernon is absolutely and wickedly clever. For those of you who are unfortunates such as myself and you missed this, go seek it out. If you are a fan of cheesy 80's slasher flicks, then this is going to have you jumping around, pointing at the screen, and screaming to the person beside you about how awesome it is (Gray is much irritated).

In this movie's setting, horror icons such as Freddy Kruger and Mike Myers are real. Through a film crew, we learn about the tricks of the supernatural slasher trade as we follow up-and-comer Leslie Vernon (Played by the rather captivating Nathan Baesel). He's charming, positive and spunky. He's the guy at the party that everyone wants to be around. He happily leads journalist Taylor (Angela Goethals) through the finer points of his rigorous physical training (we learn the secret of walking faster than running people) the art of choosing your target group and survivor girl, how to prepare and rig your spooky house way before your victims arrive, and finally, Vernon brings the film crew along for the big finale when all his plans are set to motion.

I want this movie. I want to own it right now. I haven't even brought it back to the video store and I'm sad that it's going to be gone from me.

In other news, I'm really sick of MJ music.