If it's crap ... We'll tell you
This is one of those special cases I was talking about where What's Wrong With This Trailer? would return as a special presentation so, here we go...
This time around, I'm going to be in the minority and give shit to the new Robocop remake trailer:
A lot of the responses I've read to the trailer for the remake to the 1987 sci-fi cult classic is that people are generally positive about the news, which is surprising to me because the internet is all set to give Ben Affleck shit for playing Batman before they even see any still or a video but they're all set to praise the new Robocop trailer.
I don't get it, I just don't get it because this trailer just looks like a boring, predictable action movie and a remake that we didn't need.
Much like the original Total Recall, Robocop was a heavily flawed, over the top, gory action movie that worked because it knew it was not meant to be taken seriously but at the same time, it was surprisingly smartly written, very satirical, and very funny at some points.
I mean, how in the hell are you suppose to take the phrase, Bitches Leave, and make it sound serious?:
Can't be done.
Also, the actors, Peter Weller, Nancy Allen, Kurtwood Smith, Ronny Cox, and Miguel Ferrer along with the rest of them all worked as their characters.
It's a movie that's a lot of fun to watch even if it doesn't make sense at some points. It doesn't need to be remade.
This...this just looks like a really bad idea. This looks just as bad as last year's horrible Total Recall remake.
It looks like they aren't going to try to be funny and just go straight for nothing but action with a really bland actor playing the title role.
Joel Kinnaman is an actor you may recognize from AMC's The Killing, which is argurably AMC's worst series in my opinion, and nothing I've seen from him convinces me that he's great for this role. He just comes off as bland and taking this role way too seriously.
Plus, Robocop's black suit looks horrible. You think the movie's going to keep the same silver suit style that was in the original trilogy but then they switch it over to black and it looks like shit. You don't change something like that just for shits and giggles, there has to be a purpose.
I don't like a lot of the other casting changes either even though they have some really good actors in this like Gary Oldman, Michael Keaton, Samuel L. Jackson, Jay Baruchel, Abbie Cornish, and Jackie Earle Haley but none of them seem like they are fit for these roles.
I also don't trust this director, Jose Padiha because, as I've said many times beforehand, this is a director who's never tackled a big project like this before. Okay, he did two Elite Squad movies in his homeland of Brazil but those were small budget action movies and this is a $120 million movie.
As we've seen in the past, directors who take on projects that big who haven't directed a big project beforehand rarely have success. Examples include Gavin Hood, Tarsem Singh, Timur Bekmambetov, or go back a decade ago when Stanley Tong, a prominent action director in Hong Kong who directed Rumble In The Bronx with Jackie Chan came to America and what was the first project he directed? The "light-hearted" family comedy Mr. Magoo with Leslie Nielsen.
While the original Robocop was a fun over the top action film, this new Robocop movie looks generic and looks like there's no creativity being involved in this and it's only a cashgrab on the name of Robocop, it's just like my problems with the Carrie remake trailer, it looks horrible, it looks generic, it looks boring as hell, it looks like it lacks creativity, and I have no hopes for this whatsoever judging by this first trailer.
Thanks but no thanks, Hollywood, I'll stick with the original Robocop thank you very much.
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