Way way back in August, I walked to my local comic shop and picked up a graphic novel that a lot of people said was pretty good. I sat down and I read it in the lobby of my dorm room and was drawn into a grim looking world of faded superheroes and nuclear war. The next thing I knew, I was halfway through the book and three hours had passed.
This graphic novel was called Watchmen. Since that fateful time in August, I have read the book at least five more times, enjoying it more everytime I read it. It is easily one of the best books I have ever read and I would reccomend it to anyone out there. Now in less than a month, the movie version of this great comic book is coming out, and I feel it is high time I said my peace about what I think.
Look, Hollywood, I come to you not as a Watchmen fanboy, but simply as someone who enjoys the book a lot. I dont mind you changing the movie slightly, I understand that some things wont work in a movie. I didnt sharpen my pitchfork that I use for chasing witches and Republicans when I found out you werent including the Curse of the Black Freighter in the movie. In fact, I welcomed it. It would have been too much for the movie and wouldnt have worked.
Then Zack Snyder announced that the ending has been changed so it does not include the giant alien squid. Sure, I was upset that I wouldnt see the chilling image of the squid among the thousands of dead bodies in the heart of New York, but I didnt go nuts over it. I understood why Snyder did it and I felt the new ending could work just as well.
Now it is coming down to the wire and people are choosing sides. Some think the movie will be great, others think it will suck elephant balls. I really dont know what to think. On one hand it is one of my most favorite books of all time. On the other hand, Hollywood has fucked up Alan Moore's work (and thousands of other people's work) tons of times. It doesnt help that the only movie based on Moore's work that was actually good was V for Vendetta. And while I have no problem with Snyder's love for slow motion, I was rather peturbed when I saw a thirty second clip in which half of the clip was the Comedian jumping from Nite Owl's ship in slow motion.
Look, the point is this: whether I'm a fanboy or not, I want more than anything for this movie to be good. As I watch the countdown clock on my front page get closer and closer to March 6th, I constantly hope to whatever higher power exists that this movie is not the next Batman and Robin.
So I ask you now Hollywood, on bended knees, please let this movie be good. I dont expect another Dark Knight, far from it. In fact, if the movie is as good as V for Vendetta, I will be satisfied. Just dont cock this up like you did League of Extraordinary Gentlemen or From Hell. I am not yelling at you and calling you money grubbing whores, I am asking you politely and desperately. Dont screw this up and let this be the movie we are all hoping for: A fair translation of the greatest graphic novel of all time.
PS: Yes, I realize that I'm talking to a place as if it were an actual person. Big whoop, wanna fight about it?