If it's crap ... We'll tell you
It's girls like Jennifer Check that make me nervous about women. The last thing I wanna do, is die with my pants around my ankles and have my stomach and junk completely wrapped into shreds. No thank you, pass! I'm happy being single. ^-^ LOL
Jennifer's Body is a very interesting movie. Not because of the actress (what am I say?),but because of the story (kinda). Let's face it, EVERY school has a Megan Fox. That girl that EVERY GUY would sleep with, and EVERY GIRL envys or wants to be. And those of us who hate that said Megan Fox, probably think that's what she really does. Going around killing the guys that attempt to get into her pants. This is known as a succubus. Funny part is that, every single Megan Fox-hater probably thinks the same thing. I should know, my family is among them. LOL
Anyways, the movie. Bookworm, Needy and conceited cheerleader Jennifer are best friends, they have nothing common. But, they've been friends since they were little girls. When a disastrous fire starts at a local bar,the band playing there takes Jennifer into the woods. The band performs some satanic sacrifice on Jennifer. They killed her in the woods and left her. Jennifer somehow survives and mysteriously gains an appetite for human blood.
And that's why being a groupie is not a good idea,LADIES!! The movie is great as far as reeling in it's audience, mostly the male audience. Because, let's be honest, Megan Fox is a hottie, nuff said. Every scene she was in, she managed to still be hott. There are scenes with her without make-up, ugly at some point, and what she calls her 'normal girl' look. (Yeah, how selfish is that?) But, she still looks pretty! WHY?!?!?!?!?!? What is it about her!? I don't want to be a sheep. But, she's sooo pretty!!!! Damnnit!! Even when she was covered in blood.........yup, she was still hott. When she see her for the first time after the band takes her away,she's beaten down, covered in blood, and all she had was a smile with her bloody sharp teeth....... MY GOD.........B-E-A-UUUUU-TEEE-FULL!
What? Don't judge me! xDD LOL
Back to the review, the dialogue is quite funny. Not Oscar worthy, but not quite Razzy either. -pause- Ok, maybe Razzy.......but still. Megan Fox, come on! You'd think that the Oscar winning writer from 'Juno', Diablo Cody, would do a good job in this movie.....mehhh. Stick to those cheesy hip-ster movies. The movie isn't anything more then a tease. The whole movie is waiting for Miss. Fox to reveal a boob or at least an ass on screen. Sadly, there is no nude scene or anything like that. Yeeah, I know....I'm disappointed too. The lake scene is a tease at it's best. We all know she was naked in the water. But thanks to the camera angles and the quick editing...........you were cheated out of your 8 bucks. Her hair covers her breasts and the camera does not go any lower then her upper chest or any higher then her knees. Sorry. But, it is said that there is a lot of 'special' clips that didn't make the movie, that will be on the DVD. So, expect to see Jennifer's Body a success as far as DVD sales.
But don't worry fellas, the director has your back!! They manage to slip in a girl-on-girl kissing scene and a bit of small action in the movie between Amanda Seyfried and..................you guessed it, Megan Fox. The moment lasts for only a minute, but it'll be the best minute you ever spent in the movies. The best thing to add more bang for your buck, see it with all your dude friends and a rowdy audience. I kid you not, most of the guys in my theater were cheering and clapping. Hell, I was too. That is a Oscar worthy moment!!! LMFAO!!! J/K So, you get to 'enjoy' yourself a little girl-on-girl action, just please clean up after yourself. What? There are people who have to clean the theater, please pick up your trash when the movie is over. Pervert.
Oh yeah, there was violence. Meh, could be better. They cut away to shadows and throw red paint at the wall, when Jennifer killed her 'prey'. Man, I wanted to see the emo get eaten alive!! Damn it! I just wish Jennifer would have killed more then just a few. Come on, J.K. Simmons was asking for it! LMFAO Oh yeah, Peter Parker's Boss, from Spiderman movies, was in this movie. I was waiting for Simmons to bust some 'Jonah Jameson' on Jennifer. "Jennifer, your late to class! Where's Parker?!"
Best scene in the movie for me was the credits. No, the movie wasn't bad, the still shots of the Band's room AFTER the events of Jennifer's Body. When the movie ends, we find the murdering band (The band that killed Jennifer) at a hotel in some city. The credits roll as they celebrate like any rock band would do, sniff coke, drink, mess up the room........the whole nine yards. The band gets a knock on the door, they think it's room service. The camera cuts away into static and blackness followed by screaming. Picture images appear on the screen of the murder scene. All six (Or was it five?) of the band members all died in gruesome deaths. My god, that was brilliant!! After the images appear, we cut to a security camera. Our band-killing murderer walks down the hall normally while a bunch of fans run toward the band's room only to find their idols brutally murdered. The camera zooms onto the murderer's face and it fades into black. Genuis. Now, if that had happen to the Jonas Brothers.............
In all, I think it's worth seeing. Sure, it's predictable and has crappy dialogue. But, all I have to say is one name, Megan Fox. Guys, see it! I know people will ignore this movie or give it bad review just because of Megan. All I have to say is, it's not 'Meet The Spartans' bad.......give it a chance. Go see it! In fact, gentlemen, see it with all of your homies! Let your girlfriends/wives spend the night alone, this is very much a 'dude's night out' movie. Get your buddies and just chill tonight. Then go to a bar and drink!
Headphones Review: 7.5/10